A Mystic’s Journal: Igor the Cat and Our Lady & A Glimpse of Other Realms: July 14 - 19, 2006
Friday, July 14
1 a.m.
Little sweet Igor rested on the couch, with his nose almost touching the painting of Our Lady holding Her Infant Son, for most of the day & then left for other realms around dinnertime.
A sad, very sad day.
Two or so weeks ago, I was carrying him into the kitchen and an inner voice or thought said: “What if little Igor was to leave you soon?”. And I answered: “I could not bear it.” And then I forgot about it. And now I am living it.
To try to cheer ourselves, M. and I then went out to dinner, to a nice restaurant. Suddenly, I could no longer breathe and thought I was having a heart attack. So did the ambulance drivers. They remembered me at the ER. One nurse said I looked better last week, after my EpiPen and the IV of adrenalin in the ambulance - when my heart almost stopped. This time they gave me aspirin, hooked me up to machines, hydrated me, a shot of glucose in a glass - and considered nitroglycerine. Seems I had a terrible reaction to the medication I have been taking for the events of last week. What a day. I thought I was going to join Igor.
What a week.
Saturday, July 15
2 p.m.
I was playing with little Sergei, in the kitchen, when his brother left for other realms yesterday. Sergei suddenly stopped playing with the string, and turned his head to look at something I could not see. Soon after, I felt a very loving presence near me. A few moments later, in my mind’s eye, or with the eyes of the soul - now I cannot remember which - I saw through my physical body, to a being of radiant Light directly behind me. I assume that it was an angelic being. And then this bright, radiant being entered me. We became one, in a sense. And during that time, my grief entirely disappeared. And has not yet returned.
Monday, July 17
5 p.m.
Another trip, by ambulance, to the ER Saturday night. They call me the “gardener”at the ER. So many angels in human form ... My next door neighbor, Millie, calling out her window: “I love you Laurie”, as they took me to the ambulance ... Back home again, M. brought down e-mails I had received, from friends and family and fellow healers at the Distant Healing Network, a small stack. Phone calls. A web of love fashioning itself across the globe. Love spreads even faster and more powerfully than hatred and anger - I will never understand the state of the world ... Still can barely sit up, dizzy, nauseous, still some trouble breathing ... Over 100 degrees outside, God bless whoever invented air conditioners ...
Carolyn called twice. They will come tomorrow.
JF came at ten this morning and stayed for many hours. We worked a bit on the Visits With Angels volume, editing. Section II, true stories sent to me from others and interviews. I have decided to leave them virtually untouched, unedited. They are from all over the world, some people translated them into English from their own language. I made a few changes in their translations, but am afraid to make too many changes, afraid that the rhythms and inflections of their thoughts and hearts and speech and countries will be lost. The books with true angel stories I have found and read have all been rewritten by one person, all reshaped into a single, uniform voice. As in the interviews and stories for Realms of Light, and in We Meet in Dreams - I prefer many voices, many hearts expressing themselves and their experiences in their own words, in their own way ... A kaleidoscope of styles and colors and souls, each soul reflecting their own ray of the Divine ... More like an anthology of Songs, each life and story its own song ...
My breathing seems to have finally stabilized a bit. Still flat on my back. I thought about this past week: first my heart almost stopped. Then, with Igor, it almost broke. Soon after, I almost had a heart attack, the heart bursting. That was the physical reality. But through this entire experience, this past week: I felt my spiritual Heart breaking open, sending its Light over the earth ... infinite rays of Light and Love pouring into the world. The second time, as I awaited the ambulance, in my mind’s eye I seemed to step into a burst or being of radiant Light, and I was not sure whether I was still alive in the body or not ... Perhaps I was on the verge of a heart attack and could not breathe, and needed the nitroglycerine. But was it the Heart breaking open, in a new way - more fully, more deeply - the physical body aligning itself with the soul more transparently ... The soul itself merging more fully with the Divine, more transparent ...
Tuesday, July 18
10 p.m.
Carolyn and the children came; JF stopped by; Suzanne. Ian dressed as an Indian brave, feathers stuck in a headband, a plastic bow and arrows; a deep red velvet bag slung over his shoulder, to hold the bow and arrows and a money pouch ... He was so happy ... E. showed me her newest drawings; got caught up on news and plans. Dan came by and mowed the lawns, in spite of the heat. Phone calls. When Carolyn and the children first entered the room, they brought the fragrance of Our Lady with them; a whiff again later, in the upstairs hallway. Still dizzy and faint and still mainly flat on my back.
Wednesday, July 19
9:10 a.m.
Felt well enough to retrieve the newspaper from the kitchen table this morning. Read a report from Russia, the Siberian warming and potential release of methane into the atmosphere. Billions of tons of methane possibly in those thawing peat bogs. What have we humans done to this poor earth, this beautiful planet ... Said more prayers for the earth. Flipping through the paper: more quakes, a tidal wave ...
The beautiful flowers JF brought me, arranged in the silver bucket by the coal stove, innocent, happy, like children. A few beginning to gracefully droop, unconcerned ... A young burst of color and life standing next to the buckets of ageless coal - the cycles, the history of the earth right here in my living room ... a mere few away from me, and under the statue of Our Lady on the wooden shelf above the coal stove ...
The Russian article I read earlier today states that an international panel met in 2001 and predicted that by 2100 the global temperature could rise as much as 5.8 degrees. On reflection: this does not sound that threatening. Yet if the body temperature of a human or animal were raised that many degrees - the being would probably not survive. If the earth is also a living being, we could fashion a terrible analogy: the earth’s ecosystems could not support such a fever. Which is what the scientists are saying, in their own terminology.
It would seem that the earth and the beings that inhabit it would all have their own normal temperatures. If the earth’s temperature drastically shifts, the life forms must change. We need some brave, courageous souls dedicated to saving the earth, true leaders. May they appear, and before the damage is irreversible. That is my simple prayer. And a grateful: “Thank you”.
An e-mail from Father N. He is coming to visit me tomorrow, a three hour drive each way. After so many years of writing to each other, we will finally meet.
I miss Igor terribly. So does Sergei.
A Mystic’s Journal: Igor the Cat and Our Lady & A Glimps
Moderator: figaro